I went to school for film production and took true delight in making cinematic pieces. But the thought of being the subject of any recorded medium made my stomach swirl. Pictures made me nervous. Acting was never my thing. The moment too much attention came on me I would spiral into panic mode.
When this partner asked to record our back-shots however, I said “Sure!” with no hesitation. This wasn’t an unusual request, as I’d been asked multiple times before, but he was a personal favorite of mine. I trusted him, we were always finding new ways to keep things spicy, and most importantly, I wanted to see what my ass looked like taking dick. 🤷🏽♀️ The thought had lingered in my head for years now, and valid I’d watched myself have sex in a mirror, I wanted more than a mental memory. I wanted it for my own viewing pleasures. The government already had my nudes, I’m sure a thirty second sex tape wouldn’t be the source of my demise.
So here I was not even 24 hours after getting my back broke, settled in bed, ready for my world premiere. It was your average amateur porn, frame a little wobbly cause sir was trying to stroke and film simultaneously. And there I was face down, ass up, head super stationary [in case I needed to deny this was ever me]. We comedically discussed the clip. Definitely felt better than it looked. But what solidified this as a strong C- was my horrific back arch or lack thereof.
If you’ve ever been in the arts or tip-toed into modeling, you’ve learned the impact of attractive body positioning. Even on instagram, we all know the importance of angles, poses, and crossing your legs to make those hips POP! And one of the oldest, most attractive tricks in the game is learning to keep that back arched. In fact, it is scientifically proved that the human eye loves a good arch. And whether you’re riding cowgirl, titties bouncing, with his hand holding up your arch or you’re bent over with his hand holding it down, not only is it appealing to the eye, but beneficial to the functionality of sex.
Now my ass has been deflating and my titties are already miniature, but one of the things I always considered an advantage was my unique flexibility. You could bend me like pretzel and I’d still be with the shits. This video, however, was an unfortunate realization that one of my best gifts—flexibility was dwindling at a rate faster than I had expected. I didn’t have a cat hump, but I didn’t look like I’d been dancing in studios since I was 6 neither. My man explicitly stated that I was in the clear, but y’all know I like being good at everything. Not to mention, I’m a sucker for sexual aesthetics. So I took it upon myself to prove my back was capable of … bending just a little bit further.
“A BAD ARCH CAN REALLY THROW YOU OFF, CAUSE YOU’RE JUST LOOKING DOWN LIKE … WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE.”
WHAT’S THE ADVANTAGE?
First of all, they’re sexy as fuck. But let’s think about… backshots. What do we love about them so much? The raw, animalistic vigor? The incredible sensation felt with just the right penis angling? The opportunity to see that ass with such a perfect view? The moment his dick feels like it’s made a way to your stomach, and now you’re screaming for mercy, but also don’t want him to stop because in twelve seconds this could be IT (if he doesn’t nut in the next two). Backshots are a good time. And a blessed arch can make the experience even better.
NUMBER ONE: YOU PROLONGATE THE PAIN
The vagina does expand, but it’s not an endless tunnel of soft, warm gush. Right behind it, is this lovely thing we call our cervix, which is another connection of tissue that serves as a connector between the uterus and the vagina. The point: it doesn’t open up wide enough for anything to enter unless a baby’s on it’s way out. But when that tunnels entrance is being knocked by a spirited, sturdy dick… well, it hurts like shit.
Hunching or “cat back” is really your body’s natural response to feeling fearful of pain. This reaction has a way of locking your box, in an attempt to prevent the penis from entering the vagina. This again emphasizes the need to start slow and with ease. More importantly, make sure that you’re dealing with some WAP, not some DAP. Imagine a wrecking ball flying full force to a wall that will 1000% not be opening. The pressure of the penetration attempt is extremely painful, and one of the most common reasons for running. One needs to be turned on and aroused in order for the vagina to expand.
But I’m also here to tell you, arching is the answer.
Arching your back naturally expands your vagina, so that there’s more room between his tip and your cervix. This elongated enclosure provides greater sensations for errbody. For him, it endorses the illusion that your vagina is actually endless, while for her, one feels stuffed to capacity (hopefully lol).
NUMBER TWO: YOU STRENGTHEN HIS CAPABILITIES
If partners were standing completely vertical, the sex would barely be pleasurable (if possible), because the lack of space would minimize the movement of each others hips. Both partners would be limited to small, baby strokes. But let’s say you move from flat-back to a descending angle down, your waist is now the perfect source of leverage to project his dick forward. The positioning of your hips serves as the base of his stroke, so an arched back allows for better thrusting techniques aka better orgasms.
I’ve encountered a few hunchback vibes that left me scarred. As a guy, you don’t really understand how it can be that way. Or if while I’m pounding, am I hurting her or not, because the structure of their back.”
“If she’s arched I can get a real good grip on the hips and go as deep as I want while adding pressure on each thrust(which she says hits her spots perfectly). If she isn’t arched I can’t get the full satisfaction I like.”
Men are visual creatures, and if something appears off, they put their mind on a mission to get out as fast as possible. They will literally, force a nut and find an excuse to escort themselves home. An arch not only improves the angle of penetration (cough cough G-spot), but it puts him in deeper, provides more resistance, and helps prevent fall out and annoying reinsertion.
NUMBER THREE: YOU MAKE IT EASIER TO FIND THE HOLE
Lastly, I know it doesn’t seem appropriate cause we’re grown and what not. But apparently finding the hole is sometimes a task. I’m not going to judge, because woman all look a million different ways, and I’m sure our vaginas do as well. So when you’re spreading them yeeks, it’s easier to find whatever it is they’re looking for.
SO HOW DO WE FIX IT?
How do we stop looking like a frightened cat, when placed in our favorite position? It’s actually quite simple. Stretch, and/or engage in one of today’s common practices: yoga. The goal of your stretching is to eliminate the discomfort of your body bending. You want to focus on breathing in and breathing out, while pushing your body further and further beyond it’s previous limits.
Obviously practicing yoga on a peaceful morning and getting your back blown aren’t the same thing, so maintaining the same posture can be a challenge when receiving some ding-a-ling. But that’s why finding a mental center of peace (from yoga) can be beneficial in the bedroom. In addition to being aroused and hopefully excited for penetration, a little in and out breathing can be all you need to push your chest lower and lower. The more you practice, the less effort you have to put into deepening your arch, because it turns into you body’s preset.
Some of my favorite positions are below…
the FROG STRETCH, BOW POSE, DOWNWARD DOG to COBRA STRETCH, CAMEL POSE & “Easy” KING PIGEON POSE
There are things the man can do to help as well!
- Massage the lower back, by holding one’s hips and sliding your hands down. Coordinate your massage strokes to your penetrative strokes if you’re a real one!
- Put some weight on her to help the body stretch itself. There’s always that one person with a stiff back that wants you to just step on their back and crack it out. This is the same idea — Reaching over to play with any part of her body’s anterior could have her slide just a little lower.
- PULL HER HAIR. IT WORKS!
And remember, there are always shortcuts! Extend your arms all the way in the front or prop yourself up on your elbows to extent that vaginal canal. Spreading your knees further apart, also helps deepen penetration though your arch may remain the same. Last, but not least… turn around and look back at it. This twist of your spine and elevation of your head actually elongates the arch of your back.
BETWEEN THE SHEETS 
This was a great read!!!
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